Burrel's Real Talk Question of the Week

"My husband's a workaholic!"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2007-08-22T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Anonymous asks: "All my husband does is work! From around 7AM when he gets up until around 8PM when he gets home and then after dinner from 9 to midnight he works everyday! I'm getting sick of not having a husband or a father around. I just miss him. Everytime the issue comes up we fight and fight about it. My question to you is, how can I convince him that most people work 9-6 and then they are DONE for the day without getting in a big argument? Is it unfair of me to want that? He says he's just trying to get ahead but if that's what it takes I'd rather not be ahead! Thoughts?"

Ambrose asks for advice on how to get over his ex.

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2007-07-18T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Ambrose from Michigan asks: "I have been split up with a girl that I have two children with. I thought that I was pretty much over her and then I saw her and her new man together. Then I started obsessing and hurting all over again. How do I get over this girl once and for all and just move on? I want to forget about the past eight years and just be able to be able to live free and enjoy my children on the times that I have them instead of focusing on her and her new man and the pain. How do I do it?"

"Should I pop the question?"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2007-06-18T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Warren K. from Harnett NC asks: "I've been dating this woman for about two years and she keeps dropping heavy-handed hints about getting married. I realized too that over the last few months, she's gradually moved her things into my apartment, and now stays with me five nights a week. It seems as though marriage is the next logical step, but somehow it doesn't feel right. I feel like my back is against the wall. Help."

"Am I a fool to stay with this woman?"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2007-05-24T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Eric asks: "I was just told by the person I love that they were not in love with me but loved me. They enjoyed everything and our friendship. I was their best friend. They don't want me to move out but I am so hurt and jealous. They said there was no one else. The last statement was we have everything but the intimacy. Should I stay friends or move out?"

"How do I handle a cruel mother-in-law..."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2007-05-07T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Anonymous asks: "I've been with my husband for 6 years now (1 1/2 married). He's African American, I'm Puerto Rican American. I have 2 children and 1 with my husband. Everything was 'somewhat' fine with his side of the family until we got married. Once we said "I DO" it's like they can't stand me. He has 2 other brothers and yet they call him for everything even breaking our plans to run to them. His dad is no longer as close to me as before and his Mom well, she's never tried to know the real me. Her response when she learned that I was having a baby was 'wow, I didn't think you would take it that far.' Yeah, that hurt bad. Our baby is now 3 and if we don't take her over there she would never see her grandma 'cause she doesn't come to my home. She has other grand kids and pays lots of attention to them. I don't even get a phone call from her. I would call frequently but, I've stopped since she doesn't try. When we do talk I'm not asked how I am doing and the children it's how's my husband and the little one. It's like me and my kids are outcasts. His mom will say little things to make me angry and/or hurts my feelings and yet, when my husband is around she acts nice. He has a brother in which called my home cursing and screaming at me because of some nonsense well, my husband never put him in his place nor explained that I regardless, of the problem must be respected. Well, he's planning a family reunion and my husband wants to go and I do not want to go. I always try to make my husband happy but, this time I feel I can't comply with his wish. What's the lady-like, devoted wife thing to do? Also, why can't Momma see that her son is my world?"

"Why did she dump me?"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2007-04-17T18:00:00+01:00

Q: George G. from Kentucky asks: "I've never written to ask advice before but I'm still reeling after being dumped by the woman of my dreams. I thought everything was fine. I thought she loved me and we'd be together forever then out of the blue she just told me it was over. She wouldn't give me a reason and now she won't even come to the phone even if I call ten times a day. I'm devasted, angry, hurt and bewildered. What do I do and what do I do now?"

"Am I losing the man I love?"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2007-03-22T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Gwen from NY asks: "I'm 50, a professional woman, and madly in love with a 63 year old man who has prostate cancer, but won't go to the doctor for a follow up psa. I'm so afraid of loosing him. He is also in the medical profession. We have no problems with our sex lives. He is wonderful in every other way, except when it comes to saving money. HELP, I don't want to loose him."

"My man's wandering eye is hurting me..."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2007-02-22T19:00:00+01:00

Q: Dawn K. from Cleveland asks: "I am 33 years old and met a wonderful man a few months ago, but the problem is when we are out he keeps looking at other women. He'll talk to the pretty ones and chat up the waitresses and the shop girls, and sometimes I can see he's not even listening to me but looking at some other woman across the room. He's younger than me and I've been dressing sexier to keep his attention but I'm not sure he notices and I'm starting to feel old and ugly."

"I'm married but my girlfriend is pregnant. I don't know what to do."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2007-02-07T19:00:00+01:00

Q: Troy P. from Orlando asks: "I've been happily married for five years, and have two kids, but last summer I met this cute girl at work and one thing led to another. Soon we were seeing each other on the regular. Now she tells me she's pregnant and wants the baby. I don't know which way to turn. I can't sleep, can't work and feel like I've f*** up everything."

"My husband is lying to me..."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2007-01-09T19:00:00+01:00

Q: Georgina P. from Herts asks: "I'm certain my husband is being unfaithful, but when I confront him with it, he denies it and turns it around as though I'm the one betraying him by even asking the question. So what do I do? Should I accept his answers, even though in my heart I think he's lying--or should I keep pushing it until he tells me the truth?"

"Why did he promise me one thing and do another?"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-12-05T19:00:00+01:00

Q: Anonymous asks: "It's been 2 weeks since I wrote a letter telling a man how I felt about him. I told him that I cared about him, but I cannot let my feelings get 2 involved because I know that he has began to see another woman; he was not in the beginning. I told him that I was upset because I thought that we were working toward something special. I thought that we were damn near in a relationship! But when I observed his actions, I soon realized that things are not what they seem.

Recently, I have told him so much about my personal life. I felt that he understood what I was going through, and was able to look past that. He accepted what I told him about myself, and he still treated me with respect. He offered for me to move in with him, we were seeing each other on a daily basis, and we've been intimate for awhile now. But now he's lying to me about another woman.

My question: why would he go so far into trying to make me feel wanted, and cared for? And even offer for me to live with him just to mess it up? Im confused. Did he notice some things about me that didn't notice in the beginning? But I refuse to believe that he would offer to share his living space with someone that he had bad intentions for all along. And please note, this other girl that he's talking 2 is married with a child, and she is NOT ATTRACTIVE. I have to be blunt. Me on the other hand, no kids, single, in school, independent, attractive young lady. He still calls me to spend time, but it's me saying no! I'm not willing to share him."

"Have I lost my boyfriend because I was unfaithful?"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-10-31T19:00:00+01:00

Q: Jane from NJ asks: "I made a terrible mistake a few months ago, and slept with a guy I met while my boyfriend was out of town. It was a tawdry one-nighter that I can't hardly even remember. He found out I'd been unfaithful of course--I had guilt written all over me--and said he forgave me, but I don't think he has. It all feels wrong and awkward now and I'm so scared I've lost him."

"My husband is driving my nephew away..."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-10-17T18:00:00+01:00

Q: R.T. from Al asks: "What should one do when a husband does not want a nephew to visit because he remembers something he said to him when the nephew was sixteen? He is my sisters son and she died one year ago this month. He is all I have left of my only sister. My dad died a year ago in Oct. My husband is retired army, divorced from his first wife and we have been married 30 years. I have put up with a lot of mess; but this takes the cake. He is use to giving orders and expecting them to be obeyed; but I have lost all of my family but one younger brother, including a daughter and I do not intend to lose anymore, even if I lose him."

"I've got the hots for my boss's wife..."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-10-10T18:00:00+01:00

Q: George B. from UK asks: "I first met her at a work social when he brought her along. She's got to be twenty years younger than him--much closer to my age-- and the hottest woman I've ever seen in my whole, entire life. I can tell she likes me from the way she looks at me. Now I feel sucker-punched when I see them cozying up, and when I think of them together. I'm confused, and so upset I can't hardly think or speak."

"I've fallen out of love with my girlfriend and I don't know how to tell her..."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-09-12T18:00:00+01:00

Q: C.K. from FL asks: "We've been together for over six years and always talked about getting married and having kids. Lately she's been pressuring me to name a date, but the more she does, the more this certain dread comes over me, that we're not right for each other. But I feel so guilty. She's in her early thirties and I feel like maybe I've wasted her best years for her. I know I've got to tell her. I just have no idea how to do it."

"What does a jealous guy do, when he thinks his girl may be playing around?"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-08-22T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Mac B. from Detroit asks: "I've been dating S. for nine months, and I think she's screwing around on me. I found a coat-check ticket in her jacket pocket a few weeks ago, from a club we've never been too, and I caught her whispering on the phone once or twice. She's dressing different and seems like she's even smelling different. I haven't found anything else, but it's ripping my guts out. I love her, but I'm so angry right now I can't even look at her."

"I'm scared I'll lose my husband because I'm getting fat."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-08-09T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Anonymous asks: "I've had a lot on my mind the last few years and I turned to food for comfort. When I'm eating I can block out the worry, but then I feel disgusting and stupid, like I broke a deal with myself. My husband used to say he didn't care what I look like but now I'm so much heavier than he is. We don't have sex hardly at all and I feel him looking at other women all the time and know he's just going to up and go one day. But I still keep eating. I don't know what to do."

"I can't seem to hold onto a man for more than two weeks."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-07-26T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Maria J. asks: "I can't seem to hold onto a man for more than two weeks. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm pretty, smart and people always tell me I'm very sexy. I don't have trouble attracting men, and things always heat up pretty fast in the first few dates. They tell me I'm amazing, and fun and sexy, but then they just stop calling. I have been hurt so many times, and I feel so small, I'm afraid to put myself back out there."

"I am breaking into a cold sweat--literally--at the thought of speaking in public."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-07-13T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Larry O. from NJ asks: "I have been asked to make a presentation at our corporate sales conference in September, and I am breaking into a cold sweat--literally-- at the thought of speaking in public. I want to pull out but know that will be a career-limiting move."

"I just can't cope with his jealousy."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-06-27T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Shania K. from Reading, PA asks: "I'm dating a wonderful man, but it's getting harder and harder to cope with his paranoia, jealousy and mistrustfulness. I have a demanding job, and an active social life, but am crazy about this guy and wouldn't dream of cheating on him. When I come home though he interrogates me like I'm a criminal (and the ridiculous thing is I'm starting to feel like one). He plays sneaky word games trying to catch me out, and calls me a liar. I'm so emotionally exhausted, I don't know where to turn."

"My best friend is having an affair."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-06-13T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Anonymous asks: "My best friend is messing around on her husband, and keeps using me as her alibi. I'm friendly with them both. In fact I dated Bob before she did, so it feels really bad to be her cover story. I know she's just doing her thing but I can't look him in the eye. I don't want to lose her friendship either though. What should I do?"

"My business is failing, but I'm in too deep to get out."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-06-06T18:00:00+01:00

Q: George C. from Chicago asks: "I opened up a catering business nearly three years ago, pouring a large severance package into it, along with life savings and a significant amount of borrowed capital. We've been bleeding financially ever since. I'm at that point where I don't know if I can go on, but I feel I have so much invested in this that I just don't know how I could walk away from it. I'm pretty desperate."

"I'm afraid I'm losing my son."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-05-30T18:00:00+01:00

Q: June F. from Phoenix asks: "My young son is in trouble. He's 14 years old and has taken up with a group of local kids who are nothing but bad news. He denies they're getting into anything, but I have a sick feeling that I'm losing him. The strange thing is we live in the suburbs, in a respectable area that I thought would be far away from all that ugly stuff. I thought my boy would be safe here. I don't know what to do."

"I lost my job and I lost my status too."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-05-23T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Daniel K. from NY asks: "I've just turned 40 and about a year ago was downsized at the corporation I'd worked at for over a decade. I was a VP, had a global marketing job, managed big budgets and had a big expense account. Since becoming self-employed (in other words I haven't found a job yet), people treat me completely different. They just don't seem interested in me any more. Are they reading me as a loser?"

"Do I get a second chance?"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-05-16T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Brenda V. from Taos asks: "I'm having a real hard core confidence crisis. I'm recently divorced, have just turned 46, and feel fat, frumpy and invisible. I feel so depressed. Like I had one shot at this game, and lost badly. I've wasted so many years. What can I do? Is it too late?"

"How Do I Make Friends?"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-05-09T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Jamie F. from Atlanta asks: "Burrel I've had to move cities five times in the last six years because of my job, but even though I make a big effort, I never seem to be able to make friends. Why is it so hard for me to connect with other people?"

"I 'stalk' my wife..."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-05-02T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Derrick L. from Mansfield asks: "Why don't I trust my wife? Every time she leaves home, I feel like I have to trail her. I've even skipped work a day or two so's I can keep an eye on her without her knowing. I know it's irrational but I just can't help myself. She thinks we have the perfect relationship..."

"When is good, good enough?"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-04-25T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Dani W. from Portland asks: "I know this sounds like a dumb question, but how do I know if I have a good man? There's so much peer group pressure to find a guy and get married. Half my friends tell me to wait for the 'wow' moment, and the other half tell me I'm just being too damn fussy. When is good, good enough?"

"My husband ignores me."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-04-18T18:00:00+01:00

Q: Anon P. from SC asks: "He says he cares for me then treats me like a doormat. He's always too busy, too tired, too broke or too drunk to buy me anything, take me anywhere, remember my birthday, or even sometimes have a decent conversation with me. It's not meant to be like this. What am I doing that's so wrong?"

"Is there life after divorce?"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-03-18T19:00:00+01:00

Q: Kelly K. from CA asks: "I just got divorced, and I have no idea how to cope with this new reality. There's no kids involved so it's a clean break, but I feel like a fish out of water. I don't seem to fit anymore. I know I need to make changes but I don't know where to start."

"Why don't us accomplished, sexy, 'older' women get a fair chance with you guys?"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-03-11T19:00:00+01:00

Q: Dot P. from Detroit asks: "Last week's question made me write in with my own. Why do guys always go for younger women? I will never get it. Why do they choose empty-headed 'lookers' over sexy, mature women, who know all about life, have heads full of wisdom, and hearts full of fun (and who can probably cook too)?"

"My younger wife parties, while I seethe with jealousy..."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-03-04T19:00:00+01:00

Q: Wayne D. from Miami asks: "My wife is a beautiful woman. She's twelve years younger than me, and likes to party. I work long hours and so she ends up going out with her girlfriends. Problem is I'm being eaten alive by jealousy wondering what she's up to. It's literally making me sick..."

"Online poker is taking over his life..."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-02-21T19:00:00+01:00

Q: Jeff C. from Denver asks: "I started playing poker online about a year ago. At first it felt like a bit of fun. I won some, lost some and thought it was a bit of a joke. Now I'm online for hours every day and have run up huge credit card bills. My wife doesn't know yet..."

"My Finances Are Spinning Out Of Control..."

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-02-14T19:00:00+01:00

Q: Scott K. from L.A. asks: "I have a good job but my overheads are running way higher than my income. The bills I can just about manage, but I'm spending a fortune trying to keep up socially. If it's not club dues or bar bills its cars or clothes. I feel like things are out of control financially."

"My girlfriend is bleeding me dry..!"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-02-07T19:00:00+01:00

Q: David K. from L.A. asks: "My girlfriend is bleeding me dry! Jeez, I mean I love her, but she always wants new this, new that, expensive meals out and vacations. We went to Vegas about six weeks ago, and I'm still reeling financially. I don't want to lose her, but I don't think I can keep this up."

"Why can't I get promoted...?"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-01-31T19:00:00+01:00

Q: Phillip J. from Baltimore asks: "I've been passed over for promotion again! I can't f***believe it. I work my butt off, stay late, am never sick, and even though I've missed out on the last three promotions, I haven't complained once. I've had four bosses in the last five years...

"Is my wife cheating on me...?"

Burrel Streetwise Inc. — 2006-01-24T19:00:00+01:00

Q: Ron K. from Chicago asks: "I think my wife is having an affair." I'm not certain, but she seems different somehow, distracted and remote. We argue all the time as well, and we never used to. I keep asking her what�s wrong but she just won�t say."